By Leo Milmet

 

For Ms. McGrew

 

I’m a polar bear in a snowstorm.

I blend in well with all the snow.

Or with a whiteboard.

Or whatever.

My red eyes and green nose, however,

drawn by an obnoxious sixth-grader

on Mrs. McGrew’s whiteboard, don’t really blend in as well.

What, am I a damn Christmas tree?

I hate my red eyes.

I look like a vampire in those god-awful

Twilight movies, or books, or whatever they are.

Y’know what I mean, right?

I want blue eyes.

My best friend Emily — the

Polar bear in a snowstorm to my left — has blue eyes. And she has a gold nose,

regally created for the Hanukkah season.

She’s so much prettier than I am.

She was just drawn yesterday.

I guess our job is to get people in the holiday spirit no matter what holiday we celebrate,

but it’s kinda hard to be in a celebratory mood when you look like a sad, tiny, disjointed wreath.

Whatever though. It’s fine — I,

born of two markers and a Satanic sixth-grader,

am a polar bear in a snowstorm, and a polar bear in a snowstorm I will stay.

I still want Emily’s eyes, though.

I mean, seriously, how hard is it to erase my eyes and redraw them blue? That hard? Really?

Really? Okay, fine. Whatever. You win.

 

Editor: Luke Langlois