Poem by thebirdonfire.org staffer Ike Spry
I have to take my pills
I’m a different person without them
Sure, maybe It’s not truly who I am
Or maybe I’m a failure without Western medicine
All the suffering I’ve faced
And the pain I’ve instilled
It doesn’t hurt me anymore
Knowing I live a “fake” persona
Maybe I’m lying to myself
The industry is a scam
I’m running in circles
And everyone’s a sheep but me
Maybe I’ll go off my pills
Sleep on the roof
Fall in love for the sake of my loneliness
And threaten to kill myself for attention
Or maybe
I’ll swallow down the truth
With a cold glass of water
And come to accept
I have to take my pills
I feel a forced acceptance of an imposed solution (taking the pills) expressed in a such pathos. Hopefully it’s for a good poetry and not a request of help. Hope all is well!
Regardless of whether this is a cry for help or expressing a routine with disdain, the pills are part of the American diaspora of how we maintain life as we think it should be. I am a middle aged woman that grew up with so many people that needed these pills. There is good and bad with it. It has helped many people function better and for some numbed them from their true selves. Is there a right or wrong? I am not sure but if it is such a painful existence keep in mind the pills are one way to cope. There is other ways to view this. Biochemically we are not perfect but our minds can be trained to change our viewpoints. Good luck and know that people do care and please reach out to a professional if you are in need.
This is such a powerful piece. I have read it several times and i am impressed with your insight.