Lyrics? Where We’re Going, We Don’t Need Lyrics

By Luke Langlois

Ah yes, classical music. Who doesn’t love a little elegance every once in a while?  No, not the 80s or the 90s, those classics. I’m talking about the music you are graced with when walking into the house of a cultured enthusiast or an eccentric billionaire. History has remembered the names of the larger-than-life composers like Beethoven, Mozart, Bach, Brahms, and more. But, unless you are well-versed in classical music or an orchestral instrument, do you know the names of these composers’ works? Before doing my research, I can say with absolute certainty that I had no idea which piece went “bumbumbumbumbumbumbum da da da da.” So, here are the uber-famous classics that you probably don’t know the name of. If you know all of these, go ahead and flex your genius in the comments. 

1 –  “Für Elise” by Ludwig Van Beethoven: “Für Elise,” also known as “Bagatelle No. 25 in A minor,” has the most iconic opening piano rift out of ALL of the piano riffs. Is piano rift too uncultured? Fine. The composition is an elegant piano solo. Anyway, saying that it is the most iconic of all time may be a broad and uncited generalization, but trust me; you will recognize it almost instantly.

2 – “Eine kleine Nachtmusik” by Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart: Officially known as “Serenade No. 13 for strings in G Major,” this composition begins with another immediately recognizable riff. This time, though, it’s violins!

3 – “Toccata and Fugue in D minor” by Bach: Although this is one of the most eye-catching titles in HISTORY (not),  “Toccata and Fugue in D minor” is liable to catch your ears with a sense of dread. This piece has been used in horror pop culture for decades. Listen in to enter a creaky old mansion full of monsters and ghoulies. 

4 – “Minuetto” by Luigi Boccherini: So, you’ve accidentally stumbled upon a row of mansions in the gold-laced streets of Italy. When you ring that diamond-encrusted doorbell, this composition is what you hear as the butler comes to answer.

5 – “The Four Seasons” by Vivaldi: This piece, actually a compilation of season-representing violin concertos by Vivaldi, is another composition that has consistently been associated with elegance and the finer things of life. The most famous portion of this composition comes from the opening of “Spring Allegro.” 

6 – “Peer Gynt – Morning Mood” by Edvard Grieg: This piece is likely in your mind as the “happy morning wake up” theme where the birds are chirping, the sun is shining conveniently through the window, and the recently awakened person is stretching photogenically. Bob Ross and Mr. Rogers probably woke up to this every morning.

7 – “Canon in D” by Pachelbel: This piece is so wedding that people probably do not enjoy playing it at weddings. I haven’t been at a wedding in over a decade, so I wouldn’t know. 

8 – The “Final” of the Overture to William Tell by Rossini: The “Final” from this Overture is the well-known “horse-race” song. The best way to describe this song with text is certainly “Dundundundundundundundun dun dun DUN dundudun.”

9 – “Also sprach Zarathrustra” by Richard Strauss: Imagine you’re Neil Armstrong and you are taking a cinematic walk on the moon to plant the flag of the United States. There is a 78.9% chance that Strauss’s opening melody is being played in your ears. This symphonic poem has more to it than its introduction, so continue listening (if you have the time).  

10 – “Gymnopédie no. 1” by Erik Satie: This soft composition may instill sadness, peace, relaxation, or a conglomeration of all three of these feelings. You may also be irresistibly pressed to pronounce the title of this work. It’s tough.

That’s all for now, folks. I hope you leave this post knowing at least one more classical title. I, personally, have learned to never judge a classical piece by its name. I’m starting to believe that the less you understand out of a title, the better. Obviously, this list is not all-encompassing. Dig deeper; you know more classical tunes than you think you know. Finally, listen to these works past just their minute-long introductions. Many of the universally recognizable portions are just brief moments of a tone poem that lasts for an hour. Become a classical music enthusiast and rid yourself of any lyrical corruption. This is where I would put an Italian farewell to up my culture levels, but I don’t know much Italian. 

 Art Editor: Chelsea Xu